A Flirtationship- Neither just a friendship…. Nor just a relationship.
A smile. A toss of her hair and a hug that’s kept going for JUST a second too long. Words, words, words. Annoying, confusing, toying, suggestive words. We all know what this is, guys. It’s a flirtationship; the awkward in-between stage when both sides know that something more than your average friendship’s brewing here, but it’s before either party gets the guts to explain how they really feel to each other. So, some of us might not have ever really been in a flirtationship, but we sure know friends who’ve been stuck here and just don’t develop the courage to push those buttons further. But what if the unthinkable happens? What if, (and here’s the moment for a dramatic, collective gasp,) what if this STAGE is no longer just middle ground? What if it develops into a separate category of relationship definition all on it’s own? Here are some of the pros and cons of a flirtationship and what NOT determining what’s happening can actually bring about…. From a guy’s point of view.
PROS:1.) You always have somebody to depend on and who’ll listen:- The thing with friends is, they’re there and everything, but you do have to invest time and energy listening to what their troubles are too sometimes, and no matter how many of you deny this, you WILL have to rethink statements and filter your words before warbling them out. Ina flirtationship, no such filters are needed because you know that you’re accepted and liked for who you are….Well, sort of.
2.) You always have company from a member of the opposite sex:- No matter what happens, when the need to perform casual flirtingness arises (which all teens experience at some point in time or the other), you know whom to call and just let off some steam with.
3.) No awkwardness with friends and family:- Yes, we’ve all been prey to the whispers, the giggles and the laughs behind hands when a couple is together. Sigh. The embarrassment just doesn’t end, does it, guys? Well, here’s the solution! No one knows what’s happening, so there are no suggestions or drama involved in the least bit!
4.) There’s no need for long phone calls and non-stop texting:- In a flirtationship, as mentioned before, you aren’t COMMITED to the person, so there’s no structure and rules that say you have to sit together for long hours on the phone or be in touch non-stop. Wow. Freedom, muchly, guys?
5.) NO expensive gifts and no empty wallets:- Again, you don’t HAVE to buy gifts and do all sorts of stupid romantic things to please your partner in a flirtationship. You can buy those glares you really wanted, or those amazing shoes you needed.
6.) There’s no real commitment involved:- This is probably the greatest pro possible. Heck, you’re not committed. So you can mess around with whoever you like without people giving you looks and tagging you a cheater. But don’t expect the flirtationship to last. Or move any further. In fact, count it as over.
CONS:1.) There’s no real commitment involved:- The greatest pro possible, in this case, doubles as the greatest con; since there’s no determination of the relationship, you can sometimes be objected to painful ordeals of seeing your flirtationship partner having fun with someone else. If this starts to be a problem, guys, it means she really means something to you. Don’t be stupid. Ask her and get done with it!
2.) The whiplash response:- Girls are complicated and difficult creatures to understand on normal occasions. Then take in mood swings, PMSing, etc and you’ve got yourselves a handful! If there’s a fight between the couple, the obvious card that will be played is the, “We’re not dating! You don’t own me! Don’t tell me what to do!,” one. Now THAT creates one hellovan awkward moment like no other.
3.) Physical intimacy:- Don’t get any wrong ideas on this one. At the end of a bad day, sometimes, JUST sometimes, all we guys really need is a big hug , a peck on the cheek and a squeeze of the hand that tells us that someone out there cares for us and we still matter. A flirtationship will not provide this. Ever. So, in a moment of weakness, don’t count on it.
4.) You don’t ever really know what’s happening:- As the definition goes, it’s neither a friendship nor a relationship. Sometimes, the instability of it all gets way too much to cope with. You don’t know where to draw the line and how much you can push it. Tough.
5.) Guilt factor:- Most of the time, it’s never said in so many words that what’s happening is a flirtationship. As a result, many would feel guilty because they’re leaving the other person hanging, neither here nor there.
6.) If it falls apart:- This is the absolute worst case scenario. If it all falls apart in this stage, guys, you lose the chance of that perfect girlfriend and at the same time, you lose the chance of ever keeping her as a friend and trying again later. There’s just no stability to a flirtationship and if it all falls apart, you’re doomed.
So there you have it, everyone, a flirtationship, with all the pros and cons from a guy’s perspective. Now, is a flirtationship really worth it or not? Well you be the judge. With that note, I bid you adieu.
Awkwardly yours,
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